looking for alibrandi.

“But I don’t know if I love you enough and I don’t even know if you love me enough. We don’t even love each other.”
ily bub.

there will always be someone better, smarter, stronger than you. but they’re the ones that keep you going in your life, they’re the ones that force you to aim higher. they are the reason we reach our dreams.

ily bub.

the things you find.

Guess who painted these works of art? Any ideas? The person who painted these pictures wanted to attend the Viennese academy of Fine Arts and become famous as an artist. If he had been accepted by the academy, world history would have been much different.

His name was Adolf Hitler.

 It is interesting to note that Hitler was certain he didn’t get in because his father only let him apply if he auditioned in sketching for some reason, but Hitler was a painter so he was shit at sketching. After being rejected, Hitler was homeless for 3 years in Vienna, where he was arrested several times for vagrancy.

ily bub.

i keep my promises.

and so it began. i started the letter with 'i love you. good luck. peace, friends and love'
I'm rather proud of myself. it took me a good. lets say. one to two hours? with facebook and all those sites running as well. to write out a letter to youjoung. all. in. korean. thankgoodness for google translator >.<
but woweee. korean is so pretty. i greatly enjoyed writing this letter. i hope she remembers to write back in english so i can read it >.<
ily bub.

to you.

yay! i just got my letters into the envelopes. i have. two letters. both for katie. lol? i just, haven't written replies to sarah and selina, but i'll do that on the weekend. i also need to write letters to sarah (different sarah), emily ashby, nicole merrilles, youjoung and dayle. katie's two letters consist of one page in reply to her letter, and 7 other pages about gay pride and all that ^__^ teehee >.<

we won't forget you.

ily bub.

because im so cool.

Just realized that today's date is 20102010. Mindfuck.
ily bub.

20.10.10.

why can't blogger do something like that...

People who complain that wearing purple won't stop homophobia, or separates gay and straight people

• wearing pink won’t stop breast cancer, so I guess we can’t do that anymore,
• wearing a poppy won’t bring back the soldiers who’ve died in wars, so let’s can that,
• Black history month is only about Black people, so we can’t do that because it leaves out other ethnicities,
• People, it’s a kind gesture to show that we’re committed to stopping homophobia and bullying.

WHY we are going purple

because these kids have names and they have stories. they’re real people with families and hopes and dreams that were stamped out by hate. may the reason for the color not be forgotten.

purebloodprat:

Tyler Clementi

He was a 19 year old student at Rutgers University.
After his college roommate tweeted “roommate asked for the room till midnight. I went into Molly’s room and turned on my webcam. I saw him making out with a dude. Yay.”, he lived-streamed Tyler having sexual relations with his boyfriend.Tyler threw himself off a bridge after finding out.

Raymond Chase

He was a 19 year old student at Johnson & Wales University in Rhode Island.
He hung himself in his dorm room.

“Raymond Chase was a person who liked Harry Potter and Rugrats and was a member of the popular facebook group “I cant spell “bananas” without singing hollaback girl.” (source)

Seth Walsh

Seth Walsh was a thirteen year old middle school student.

He was bullied to the point that he could not bear to live.

“He spent a lot of his life frightened.” It was in person, through the internet, through phonecalls. His peers were relentless. He was perpetually picked on for his mannerisms and his style of dressing, even before he came out as gay.
His mother found him hanging from a tree in their backyard. He spent over a week lingering on life support before he died.

Asher Brown

He was a 13-year-old eighth grader at Hamilton Middle School outside Houston His family says that he was “bullied to death”.

”Asher was tormented for being small. For his religious beliefs. For the way he dressed. And for being gay. His bullies acted out mock gay sex acts in phys ed class.”His parents repeatedly contacted school officials on his bullying. Nothing was ever done.
He shot himself in the head.

Billy Lucas

He was a 15-year-old freshman at Greensburg High School in Indiana.
“Everyone made fun of him.” Like Asher, his school administration knew but did nothing.
A friend says the bullies would call Billy “gay and tell him to go kill himself.” Homophobic hate messages have been left on his facebook memorial page.


and there are more

The death toll for this school year is already at 7.
Seven kids who have lost their lives because of hateful peers.

It’s horrible that it’s taken tragedies like this to finally wake this nation up.

this is my baby brother, Jerry. 

He’s 10 years old, and people at school always pick on him. They call him a faggot and a “Flamer”, This is elementary school kids that do this, too. Few weeks ago, he got sick of it and tried to hang himself. He’s in my room right now, and said that he just can’t help crying because of how mean people are to him. He’s a very feminine boy, but that doesn’t mean he’s gay, and if he is, i’ll love him regardless. But he’s hurting and nobody in my family seems to care but me, and my baby sister but she cares about everyone. He’s such a cutie pie, but he asked me if it was normal that he thought some guys were cute but only thinks girls are pretty, I told him yes, it’s perfectly normal, that he is just a little boy. 

He said that he doesn’t understand why bullying happens, and I told him because they are ugly humans on the inside, he’s so sad, and it kills me. He’s such a beautiful boy. I wish he wouldn’t get picked on because he honestly doesn’t deserve this! 

Jaheem Herrera was 11 years old, and a fifth grader. He was a nice and shy boy who loved to make friends. This didn’t stop other kids from taunting and teasing him. He was constantly called gay, even though he wasn’t. He was also called ugly, and the virgin. 

The mother contacted the school seven or eight times, but no action was ever taken. The bullying continued until one day Jaheem had enough, and hung himself in his closet April 16, 2009.

If the school had taken action, things could have been different. If someone stood up for this poor boy, things could have been different.

Rest in peace Jaheem. May your memory live on.

LAWRENCE “LARRY” KING.
February 2008

I didn’t know him personally, we didn’t even go to the same school. I didn’t even know of him until he appeared all over the local, and apparently national, news. At the time, he was 15 years old and openly gay. Roughly my age. In fact, he was my age. He is my age. Difference? He was out of the closet by at least the 7th or 8th grade.

One day, he was shot by a classmate during school hours. He was a victim of a hate crime; a victim of homophobia. From what I know, he was victimized solely because of his sexual preference. He never made any advancements on his shooter. The gunman.. Just decided Larry didn’t deserve to live, I suppose.

We’re both from Oxnard. I remember walking to my friend Jackie’s house and passing by the school he attended. I’m sure you can imagine how I was then scared shitless to even think about coming out of the closet.

I’m one of the lucky ones, who haven’t been bashed on or tortured. I think that’s what people should focus more on: a broader perspective. Yes, the six suicides started a motion across America as well as Tumblr, but what about everyone else? What about all the suicides gone unnoticed by the media because they “weren’t interesting enough” or all the hate shootings going on?

Jose Antonio Rodriguez is a U.S. Navy veteran who was discharged under ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ after his sexual orientation was discovered following being drugged, kidnapped, and brutally raped.  Rodriguez has since become an outspoken advocate for repeal of the antiquated law.

Rodriguez is so disturbed by reports of recent suicides of gay teens because of school bullying that he sends this heartfelt plea to all LGBT youth in America:

Joe Rodriguez was discharged under DADT.

I know it may be tough to be a young gay person.  I know it’s hard to have to hide your true essence and live a happy childhood and be who you really are. I understand it’s hard to have to hide in front of family and friends as you grow up to be the man or woman God brought into this world.  I ask you to keep faith and not give in to all the bullying and harassment.

I was once in the closet, just like you, and felt the pain and mental anguish of hiding who I really was until my 28th birthday last year. I was raped by a group of men in June 2009 while I was still in the Navy.  My fellow sailors then perceived me to be gay, and harassed me because of the rape at the hands of other men.  They were right – I was a gay man, yet I did not deserve to be treated in a hateful manner.  But I stood strong and I am winning the battle now. I ask you to do the same. I understand how you feel, but I beg you to please not give up.  Please stand strong and DEMAND EQUALITY. You are all God’s children and he loves us all!!  You are beautiful to everyone.  We are not different.  We are just a little more special, because God made us special, with love, and with love to give.  You are beautiful in my eyes and everyone’s eyes.  LIVE WITH PRIDE AND LIVE IN YOUR TRUE ESSENCE!  I love you all, and please don’t give up.  You are the ones coming up in the world and we need a strong generation for years to come.  We are not weak. So please, be patient and stand up with pride and fight for your equality!

Sincerely,
US NAVY Gay Veteran
Jose A. Rodriguez

Homosexuality.

This is regarding the recent suicides. It’s ridiculous that the boys or girls who committed suicide were bullied to the point that they had to give up their lives because the teasing was unbearable. The society has changed. Now, it’s so judgmental, people can’t express their individuality. I don’t understand that homosexuality would even bother straight people. It’s not like they bullied you, bothered you, or etc. tsk.

“That’s so gay” or “no homo,” to phrases that are said a lot. To some, it’s just a friendly gesture. But seriously? People act like being gay is bad. I’ve never read the Bible, but I’m pretty sure it doesn’t say anything about homosexuality. People just interpret that wrong from generation to generation.

I mean, I was teased for who I was. Though I’m straight, people still made fun of me because they thought otherwise. They  called me a “faggot,” “weakling,” or etc. I was treated differently because I didn’t do/like what the other guys did or do.

People that are in denial or hidden about their sexual orientation. Don’t be scared. There are people out there that’ll love and support you for who you are. Don’t do anything irrational.

So I understand that some people are angry about us writing evil on the church.

Well I’m sorry that you’re a crazy religious freak, but the last time I remember talking for an extended time with a christian who wasn’t Marcia, I got raged at for being gay for 2 and a half hours, during which I got told that I was a devil child and would end up in hell with all the rest of “my kind”. So excuse me for not respecting them too much, but it’s not as if I’ve actually had one of them respect me. And I can never have respect for people who judge me for who I am without even attempting to get to know me. And people wonder why I’ve lost my faith in humanity. Please unfollow me now, and tell me about it because I don’t want to follow dickheads who rant without knowing the full story. Oh and could you do me a favor, and go fuck yourself with a rake before killing yourself. Good fucking bye.

This will be the end of this whole piece of shit. I don’t want to hear any more bullfuck about this okay. I am seriously pissed about this. I am seriously so fucking close to fucking snapping right now. My brain is fucking burning. If I hear one more fucking thing about this, I will fucking murder you with a fucking sewing needle.

Gay, Bisexual, Straight or Transgender,

we’re all fucking human.

LBGT relationships. It's just love, what could be possibly wrong with that?

get bent homophobes.

disclaimers: nothing is mine. i think.

ily bub.

where has my judgement gone.

i'm really sorry. but i don't know how to answer you.
ily bub.

spell your full name without an e,f,r,s,k.i,m.l.c.a.y.n.

well. according to that. I'm a gun.


well. if anybody HINT HINT TUNA wants to call me asap - please do so :3
ily bub.

i should do more..

fingers cut and lined.
throat soar and dry.
evidence of a good guitar sesh
<3
ily bub.

gerad way.

BE YOURSELF.
DON'T TAKE ANYONE'S SHIT.
AND NEVER LET THEM
TAKE YOU ALIVE.

ily bub.

love in the ice.

Trans:

It’s not your fault those hands are freezing Born from those childish days, you carry the scars
Are you afraid to love someone?
Pretending you don’t see the other side of the words
Like ice, the embraced heart slowly starts to thaw

* For anyone to be loved by someone,
Makes life in this world shine
If it was me, I’d make your heart warm once more
With eternal tenderness

Even if fate’s mischief pains the heart
On the other side of those tears,
A single ray of light will swoop down into the darkness
We know

As strong as the feeling of suffering, we can feel people’s warmth

Everyone is searching for a place
That can heal their sadness and loneliness
So… for you, that place is here
Don’t be afraid, don’t hesitate anymore, because I’ll protect you
My heart is pained
Because this love is so beautiful, don’t be afraid
Even if it’s just momentarily, I’ll let you know my love
This time is beautiful, you know… let you know my love

Everyone is searching for a place
That can heal their sadness and loneliness
So… for you, that place is here
Don’t be afraid, don’t hesitate anymore, because I’ll protect you

ily bub.

altitude sickness.

mm. im studying this for science. this is the first day that ive done homework really this term :3
holy shit i have a maths test soon ): really cough* not at all scared...
this year has been the worst and with only a few short highlights..
the last time i had fun and got high was at marshmead - term 2...
im sick of this ):
ily bub.

innocence lost.

i wish times were back here.

not just back when this movie came out.

but also back when everyone was young.

and innocent.

and happy all the time.

things are just to complicated now.

ily bub.

where am i.

i spend so much fucking time trying to reach you guys.
trying to be like you guys.
but why am i? and its so damn fucking hard to.
its just not me.
but i want to. - why do i want to?
i dont even know who  i am anymore.
.. or what i really want anymore.
ive spent so long over something -
i cant seem to give it up.
i cant seem to give you up.
ive changed so much
going through different phrases
but i always end up looking down the same alley
.
i want to be like you.
i want to be you.
i want to be anyone - because i dont want to be myself anymore.

im lost.

ily bub.

so much. too much.

i love you so much >.<

and you said there was no limit

- so here i go, still loving <3

ily bub.

you promised.

you're goddamn perfect.

ily bub.

what is this.

pshhh - who the fuck is george?
but - OTHERWISE
pretty much..
yeah >.<

ily bub.

you were my best.

ily bub.